Hogwarts Gone Nuts
by Wandhappy
Summary: harryron....hermionedumbledore neville and god only knows what. What happends when ron nfollows harry? is harry gay? and what are they putting in hermione cornflakes? I suck at summeries read any way.... review plz! it cant be that bad
1. Chapter 1

A/n- HI MY name is Jessica also known as Wandhappy, This is my first thought out fanfic I know it is retarded but IT is the retarded story's that I love to read love to read so i thought i would write one.

DISCLAIMER- I own harry Potter hahahahahahahahahahahahahahah

ahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah

ahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahaha

hahahahahahahahaaaaaaa...no

Review if you think it worth reviewing woopwoop

Chapter 1

"I am your all powerful ruler, your leader, your master. Bow down before me i say." Dumbledore, who was obviously on heroin, bellowed from his chair at the Hogwarts school of witch craft and Wizardry staff table. The students who were used to it by now just ignored him and rolled there eyes. But seeing as how Neville Longbottom is a dip shit, he started to bow down. Over at the Gryffindor table how ever a familiar 16yr.old red head, turned to The-boy-who-lived-and-we-say-his-name-to-god-damn-much and sighed.

"He has seriously been to high for to long"

"Ron you asshole!"Harry yelled a bit to loud. Harry slipped down llittle in his seat.

"What the hell was that for harry?"

"Nothing, nothing at all "Harry shifted his eyes a bit and obviously wanting the subject changed added "Where is Hermione?"

Ron looked a little uneasy at the question, "Well, ever sense she has been taking those damn acting classes, she has been a different person every day, like Tuesday when she was that alien from outer space, let me tell you it is not fun being Prob-...Damn it all to hell" Ron's eyes had quickly averted to the Great hall entrance his expression was slightly scarred. Harry wondering what had gotten his friends attention followed rons gaze. Harry nearly shat himself.

Sat the great hall doors stood what harry assumed to be Hermione Granger, But looked alot like a wannabe Eminem. Hermione stood at the entrance in what appeared to be boxer shorts hanging out of a pair of big sagging jeans witch made her look like she had a footlong dick in there, harry saw rons eyes stare questionably in that location. She also wore a shirt that said Once you go black you never come back. Sh e had chains hanging out her jeans and long ,money sign gold chains hanging from her neck. HE hair was hidden under a do rtag. She pimp walk all the way over to a terrified looking ron.

"What up dawgs?"

Harry of course being stupid yells OH MY GOD Sirius is alive???? excitedly harry looks all around the room for any sign of his god father, causing all the other students what kind of stuff he is sniffing, Dumbledore mean while yelled out DANCE MY PUPPETS DANCE

Ron rolled his eyes. "Harry you dumb ass Sirius has been dead for liker a year now along with voldemort."

Harry turned to Ron "Oh right, anyway then who were you talking top Hermione?"

"IO was talking to you cracker. Harry cocked an eyebrow at Ron which was a waste seeing as how rons face was hidden in his hands. So harry turned his gaze back to Hermione.

"Hermione... why the fuck are you dressed like that?????"

Hermione looked pissed. "Get off my up of my grill yo you be tripping i am kicken it old school."

Harry slightly taken aback "you want of your what with who ... what?"

"I said ge-"

harry cut her off "What the hell is on your teeth they are gold!"

Hermione smiled showing goldteeth, "These be ma grills yo, I'm blingblingin"

Harry being whiter than Micheal Jackson, "OHHHHHHH wait i want on your teeth"

Ron who apparently decide to join in on the conversation, "Hermione why are you doing this?

Hermione looked at him"Don't be call me hermoine Call me fatback, ha be my pimp name yo"

Ron went red and decide to inspect what was left of his dignity in his hands

HARRY LOST FOR WORDS WAS ABOUT TO JUST give up when Hermione broke the awkward silence

"Foshizzle biozzle I gotta go check to make sure my hoes are making me money, Catch a on the flip side peace out NIGGAs."and w that fatback left, and the awkward silence came back for a visit till ron finnally feeling it wzas safe again popped his head back uip.

"What the fuck"harry looked at ron for a explanation.

Ron meekly shrugged, "Honestly harry its not that bad ya know Yesterday she was a cow girl and that has been my favorite so far.

"Whys that ron?"

"Cuz i got to be her horse."

End of chappie!!!!!

What do y'all think... not to bad?In have already written chapter 2 and its pretty funny. Harry gives dumbledore cooking classes... what happens when ron follows harry and only hears whats going on

REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW and yeah and did i mention REVIEW NO FLAMES PLEASE i mean if you really didn't like my story why did you tread it all the way down to here and wshy would you make the effort to review?

LOVE LOVE KISS KISS SMACK Smack

Jess

oh AND THANKIES TO MY b.f.f AND MY BETA SESSHOUMARUCRAZY, she is also a fanatic writer all though most of the time she is a fanatic reader and reviewer Tee Hee Oh sesshoumarucrazy, I am still waiting on our plane tickets to paris from Dumbledore, he is a bit on the cheap side, i think we will be traveling by cargo stall!!!


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: You know something………..good cuz I don't.

Disclaimer: Trust me if I owned Harry potter My ass would not be here, my ass would be in a tub…….full of money……and chocolate or better yet….chocolate covered money

REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW

Chapter 2

Assumptions and...bread

Ron collapsed to his Gryffindor four poster bed (A/N: I wish I was in that bed to!). Today had to have been the most fucked up day. It all started after the incident at breakfast. "Fatback" was in potions and some girl said she looked stupid, and Fatback's reply was "Don't make me bust out my nine (A/N: It is not good the play with guns…..Unless they are to kill your internet boyfriends!)." Ron was still trying to figure out what the hell that was... The she started to slap all the girls that passed her saying stuff like "Where is my money ho?" or "Why aren't you with a client."(A/N: If y'all haven't figured it out by now, I am white. I have nothing against Black people. I am not racist I hate everyone equally. J/K ) All the girls of course turned on Ron saying "What the hell are you putting in you girlfriends cornflakes?" Ron would always reply back "What the shit are corn flakes?".(A/N: Ha Ha Ron ur so funny)

Harry however seemed to have an okay day, Well as far as Ron could assume. Harry had been in and out of classes all day long, he even missed a few. Right before Harry collapsed in to his own bed Ron had shot questions at him "Where were you?" and "Why did you leave me with her all day". Harry just blushed and said "nonya" and with that Harry's curtains were drawn. (A/N: wow I haven't used the word 'nonya in a long time.')

It was pitch black in his room. And the only occasional sounds were the snores of the Gryffindor boys and some inaudible words from Neville. As Ron began to think on he heard some one stir. Sitting up quickly and silently, he strained his eyes as hard as he could, to try and see who was up. He looked over to Harry's bed and swore he saw the outline of Harry's body get up and he was proven right when the door leading out of the dormitory was opened revealing light that hit raven black hair.

The door closed behind Harry, and Ron sat there curios. So curios that he started to fight with him self...out loud

"Go after him"

"No, he deserves privacy"

"But what if it is something bad that he is doing"

"Harry is a big boy "

"Harry is a dipshit"

"No he's not"

"Yeah and Snape washes his hair"

"No he doesn't"

"Sarcasm Ron"

"Wait???? Why the fuck am I talking to my self"

Ron, confused as to why he just talked to himself, got quietly off his bed and headed towards the door. Passing Neville's bed he finally heard those un audible words

"Oh yeah"

Ron stopped to hear what Neville was saying

"You are a naughty little daisy aren't you?"

Ron, looked a little confused as to why Neville was dreaming about flowers and why he called a daisy naughty, listened a bit longer

"Hmmmmhmmmm you take those pedals of oh yes let me smell you"

Ron, who thought he had been creeped out enough turned and headed back towards the door mutter under his breath something that sounded like "No amount of therapy will ever fix that.". He reached his hand out to the door and slowly opened it just in time to see Harry slip through the portrait hole.

Running back full speed Ron grabbed Harry's Invisibility cloak, which Harry oddly did not take. He grabbed his wand and turned to head back out the door. Unfortunately he didn't get out side before he heard Neville again

"OH yeah you sexy daisy you like it when I rub your pedals on my feet oh God YES"

Ron basically jumped through the door making a mental note to him self to watch out for Neville.

As he walked through the Gryffindor tower, to exit out of the portrait hole, he noticed some house elves doing the cleaning. He reminisced in the memories of what the old "fatback" would have done if she saw this. He nearly tripped over all the books and bags lying in the floor. Eventually he got out in one piece.

As soon as he walked out of the portrait hole he looked right to left trying to find a glimpse of Harry. Finally spotting him walking past a Knight, he sped up after him.

Ron had never really traveled Hogwarts at night by himself. He was usually with Harry or whoever Hermione happened to be that particular day. Yeah, Harry was here but as far as Harry knew Ron wasn't. As Harry sped up so did Ron. after placing a silencing charm on his shoes, Ron rounded the corner

As they kept on, Ron seemed to notice just how creepy Hogwarts was at night. The only sounds he could here were of Harry's feet hitting the floor with each step he took. Every time he passed a suit of armor he got that 'Somebody's watching me' chill run up his spine. He swore he saw Mrs. Norris peeking from the one-eyed witch statue. Ron was so involved in his getting creeped outness that he barely had time to stop.

Ron, not knowing how he didn't with out Harry catching him, fell to the floor. Ron was so caught up in being scared he almost ran into the now immobilized Potter. Ron had, in need of not blowing his cover, jumped to the side and landed on the concrete floor with a 'smack'. Harry had not even turned around to see what happened.

'Wow' Ron thought to his self, 'Harry really is a dipshit.' As Ron picked himself up he looked at his surroundings, his stomach clenched.

They were out side of Albus Dumbledore's office. Ron thought hard, the only time Harry had ever come to Dumbledore's office was for emergencies and to bring Dumbledore his weekly cocaine. It couldn't possibly be an emergency could it? Voldemort had all ready been defeated (turns out he was deathly allergic to hugs) and Harry already took him cocaine yesterday so what was going on and why had Harry kept it from him and Hermione?

Ron's thinking was cut short.

"Some like it hot, some like it cold, but I like my Pot 9 days old (A/N: Drugs are bad I don't use them and I suggest none of you use them, prescriptions are the way to go! J/K)" Harry said casually, The gargoyle that guarded Dumbledore's office sprang aside to let Harry and invisible Ron enter. Harry quickly walked forward and opened a door. Ron quietly followed behind as Harry shut the door. They were greeted by flights and I do mean flights of steps. 'Fuck!' thought Ron, 'Just what I need this late at night.' Harry and invisible, lazy Ron began to climb.

As Ron climbed what seemed to be the tenth flight of stairs, he said a little to loudly "How does the old mother fucker climb these God damn things, I mean come on."

Luckily see has to how Harry Potter is a dumb ass he hadn't notice some one un seen just cuss.

As Harry jumped up the last stair he headed to a large oak door. Ron trying to get there a little to quickly tripped up the stair, causing to once again fall and to miss the chance to go in the door with Harry. Ron got up, furiously I might add. And walked over to the now closed oak, seeing as how he missed his chance he would just have to listen. Very reluctantly he pressed his ear hard against the door.

WHAT RON HEARD

As Ron stand there waiting patiently for someone to make a sound, Dumbledore broke the silence.

"Harry, finally you are here."

"I am so excited on being back here professor maybe we can finally get some stuff done."

Ron stood there pondering what 'stuff' they were referring to.' 'Maybe they are growing their own marijuana.' Ron thought, this could come in handy, maybe they would get student discounts.

"I thought I would have to start without you Harry, and you know I don't get any where doing it alone" Dumbledore said.

Ron's pondering was derailed off of the marijuana track, Dumbledore would do drugs with Bill gates humping a Mac. in front of him, he didn't care.

It was now Harry's turn to speak. "Well it would get you warmed up for me." Dumbledore chuckled.

Ron was apparently missing something. Why did he need to warm up for Harry? What was he warming up for?

"Alright Harry time to get serious, I don't no how long I can last for you tonight. Did you bring protection?"

Ron who was sure he heard wrong, well that hoped that he heard wrong, kept listening.

All Ron could here was movements and muffled grunts. This scared him a little, he had to be overreacting, and Dumbledore could not possibly tickle Harry fancy. Harry was straight...right?

Dumbledore spoke again ion a rather worried and embarrassed tone "I wont get hurt will I?, I mean after it is my first time"

Harry laughed a bit before he spoke. "Oh professor, don't worry you're with me, and I have done it more times than I could count so I will be here to help."

Ron wasn't sure if he wanted to burn his eyes out, I mean what good would that do he would still be able to hear them. He decided therapy being the best, he listened on.

Also he wondered whom Harry had done it with and why did Dumbledore want to prey on Harry... It's just like Michael Jackson...right?

"Right Harry, Well now we have put on our protection. Lets get started on what we left out on from earlier today."

'AHA' Ron thought so this is where Harry was today...Ron thought again 'EWWWW this is where Harry was today'

Ron could hear some moving going on and something being put down on a hard surface like on a table.

"Now professor you take this" apparently Harry had handed something very large to Dumbledore because this was Dumbledore statement...

"Wow Harry that is huge"

Ron flinched a little, so Harry was huge, yeah well so was Ron...he had big feet, that meant he was huge...right?

Dumbledore continued "Do you think it will fit?"

Ron assumed Harry was gonna do Dumbledore, and also made a mental note to himself never to use those words in the same sentence again.

Harry spoke "No I think we could probably stuff it in."

"Yes good idea Harry I think that could work, you put your hands on one side and I'll put mine on the other."

"1-2-3 push"

ahunnnnnnnhmmmmmmmmm oh god I think it is going in I think it is in yes yes yes uh.

"Wow professor that went quicker than expected don't you think?"

"Yes indeed Harry"

By this stage Ron wasn't sure what to think of all of this, he was to frightened to think of all of this...

"Now, Professor We need to put it in your oven and let it sizzle, and do not take it out to soon or we will be in trouble"

"Why is that Harry?"

"Because it will deflate or sink in."

"Ah wouldn't want that to happen would we, well Mr. potter I think that's all I can last for tonight. Shall we continue tomorrow?"

"Yes I guess" Ron could note the disappointment in his voice when he said it.

Dumbledore answered "Why, what is wrong Harry"?

"I wish I could do all this with Ron. I mean Hermione is not my type to do all this stuff with. She is probably way better at it than I am and I know Ron has no experience that I know of."

At this Ron was pissed. He had loads of experience... does yourself count?

An odd feeling was erupting in Ron's stomach. Suddenly he wished he was in there with Harry doing it, but it wasn't that he liked harry oh nononono He just wanted Harry to know he had experience... to and extent

"Ah Harry, maybe you should just attack him with it, then maybe he will give in and you could both have fun."

"May be your right professor I mean I like him enough."

At this Ron's ears turned red, so he did like Ron... Hmmmm Ron thought that maybe being with Harry wouldn't be so bad...no he could not like harry...Harry was a dude... and that was being gay... he started to fight with himself again

'You like him'

'No I don't'

'Yeah and Harry's ass is ugly'

'No it's not'

'...'

'Awww fucksnot!'

'Your someone who just out gayed themselves'

'You just shut the fuck up'

'Sense I am you and we are fighting and you just told me to shut the fuck up, wouldn't that mean you just told your self to shut the fuck up?'

'Huh?'

After Ron stopped fighting with Ron long enough to hear Dumbledore and Harry express their good byes he had just enough time to remove himself from the door and back out of Harry's way as he came out of Dumbledore's office.

WHAT WAS REALLY GOING ON BEHIND DUMBLEDORES OFFICE DOOR

As Harry reached the top step he could see the big oak door leading in to Dumbledore's office.

As he walked in he could smell the pot brewing. He had felt a little uneasy about doing this with Dumbledore, but excited just the same. But as seeing that they had been preparing for it all day to day he needed to get a little more done tonight. As soon as he walked in he saw Dumbledore sitting at their table they had fixed earlier that day. Dumbledore smiled as Harry walked in, there was a bit of an awkward silence before Dumbledore decided to break the silence.

"Harry, finally you are here."

"I am so excited on being back here professor maybe we can finally get some stuff done"

"I thought I would have to start without you And harry you know I don't get anywhere doing it alone" Harry thought if Dumbledore had started without him it would have given him extra practice but then he did realize Dumbledore cooked like Hermione played Quidditch, he sucked.

"It would have gotten you warmed up for me"

Dumbledore chuckled. "Alright Harry time to get serious, I don't know how long I can last for you tonight, did you bring protection?".

Harry nodded. He had brought the aprons. He was soooo totally not going to ruin his cloths and Dumbledore couldn't afford dry-cleaning with all the pot he buys.

He handed Dumbledore one and he had one for himself. He saw the confused look on Dumbledore's face. Harry started to pull his on, It fit a little snug and was hard to tie in the back Harry grunted a bit. Dumbledore, mimicking Harry, got his on.

Harry walked over and grabbed a bread pan it was rather small but was heavy, he heaved it over to their cooking table and he noticed a concerned looking Dumbledore.

Dumbledore spoke in a worried tone.

"I wont get hurt will I, I mean after all it is my first time"

Harry knew that cooking the muggle way was a bit on the un safe side. Your messing with very hot things and after all and you could get burned. Harry laughed a bit before he spoke

"Oh professor, don't worry you're with me, and I have done it more times than I could count so I will be here to help."

Dumbledore studied him for a minute, which basically told Harry he had his trust.

"Right Harry, Well now we have put on our protection. Lets get started on what we left out on from earlier today."

Harry decided to take the lead from here. He handed Dumbledore an oversized loaf of bread dough.

"Now professor you take this." as Harry handed it to him, he noticed Dumbledore eye the loaf then the pan, Harry was a dumbass but he could put 2 and 2 together.

"Wow Harry that is huge" Dumbledore said.

Dumbledore studied it for a moment and continued Dumbledore continued "Do you think it will fit?"

Harry thought for a moment and then spoke.

"No I think we could probably stuff it in."

Dumbledore pondered for a moment

"Yes Harry I think that could work, you put your hands on one side and I'll put mine on the other."

"1-2-3 push"

It was harder to push this in than Harry expected but oddly they quickly got it stuffed.

Ahunnnnnnnhmmmmmmmmm oh god I think it is going in I think it is in yes yes yes uh.

"Wow professor that went quicker than expected don't you think?"

"Yes indeed Harry"

Harry looked at the bread, it was ready to bake. He looked over at the oven he helped Dumbledore install earlier that day, he turned to Dumbledore

"Now, Professor we need to put it in your oven and let it sizzle, and do not take it out to soon or we will be in trouble"

"Why is that Harry?"

"Because it will deflate or sink in."

"Ah wouldn't want that to happen would we, well Mr. potter I think that's all I can last for tonight. Shall we continue tomorrow?"

"Yes I guess" Harry shifted his eyes a little. As odd as it was teaching Dumbledore to cook, he loved cooking, well not so much the cooking as spending time with men, he had grown accustomed to them ever sense Ginny and him had split. Between you and me any thing with breasts did not amuse Harry except Dolly Pardon, but seriously who doesn't she amuse.

Harry thought he didn't like Dumbledore hell no!

Dumbledore answered "Why, what is wrong Harry?"

Harry pondered for a moment whe

n a familiar red head popped into his mind

"I wish I could do all this with Ron. I mean Hermione is not my type to do all this stuff with. She is probably way better at it than I am.(this was true Harry thought women can usually cook very good). I know Ron has no experience that I know of(also true Mrs. Weasley did all the cooking, its not that he liked Ron or anything...right?)."

"Ah Harry, maybe you should just attack him with it. then maybe he will give in and you could both have fun."

Harry thought. Was Dumbledore talking about the cooking or was he talking about something else. Sometimes pot made Dumbledore smart.

Harry smiled "Maybe your right professor I mean I like him enough." Harry was wondering why he had added the liking Ron enough part to his answer he was sure it was just a mistake.

"Good night Harry"

"Good night professor Dumbledore"

Harry put his hand on the doorknob and walked out of the office.

End of Chappie 2

Not feeling the love yo!!!!. I am sorry about my grammar, my beta is sesshoumarucrazy...lol I love you Hannah. Also I didn't review my self in chapter 1 Hannah (sesshoumarucrazy) was on my account trying to upload my story for me, and when she went to review it for me, she was still on my name... so sorry

If you review my story I will give you each Virtual Ice cream yummy!!!!!!! And for those of you trying to watch those pounds...virtual cardboard!

Jess


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: Okay….. I so don't feel the love. A few of y'all added me to your favorite stories, but you didn't review….what is up with that????

Disclaimer: I sooo own Harry Potter………………………….in my dreams……I'm also happily married to Rupert Grint in my dreams to…………..Dreams come true right?

ANSWERS TO REVIEWS

Sesshoumarucrazy: I love you Hannah. I think people think I'm a moron whether I review my self or not. Though sill this whole thing was pretty funny. I love you Hannah!!!!!!!! I am gonna finish my room o I can come and invade yours BWHAHAHAHAHAHA…. OH and as I promised you get a virtual cookie….. It is Chocolate chip….yum!

Jess

Chapter 3

Confused

As Harry said his good-byes to Dumbledore, he reached for the door. Ron, who had just got done fighting with him, moved quickly out of the way to avoid Harry.

It was a bit awkward for Ron to look at Harry. He looked into those emerald green eyes. He admired the 6 years worth of Quidditch muscles. He saw that slight grin Harry always had. Ron wasn't sure why he had suddenly noticed this but Harry was pretty sexy.

"Gross you think Harry is sexy"

"I do not"

"You like Harry, you like Harry"

"Stop you are like so mean!"

"Ron and Harry sitting in a tree, k-I-s-s-I-n-g"

"…"

"Oh faget like my cutesy poutsy song?"

"Dude you just said cutsy poutsy, and you call me gay!"

"HA! I am you dumb shit!"

Ron mentally started to beat himself up until he noticed Harry still just standing there. His hands by his side lost in thought. Apparently he seemed to have come to a decision and started to walk slowly back to Gryffindor tower. Ron seemed to be at a loss of words to think to himself.

He did want to know why Harry and Dumbledore had a thing, it wasn't like he was jealous or anything. I mean Harry and Dumbledore was basically illegal…..right? Ron still didn't know why he was jealous towards all this…wait didn't the Author of this story just decide he wasn't jealous? Wow , I just confused my self…but you know what he can be jealous and not be jealous at the same time if I goddamn choose….put that in your nose and blow it….Any way back to the story….

Ron was so confused. He liked Hermione right? That was his girlfriend. Ron looked up, he was some how still following Harry. It was a amazing that Ron's feet were guiding him, he didn't even know where he was and he had a feeling Harry didn't either.

Harry walked on to wherever in hell his feet were taking him 'where am I ?' he thought. Dumbledore's advice was still ringing in his head. "Attack him with it, maybe he will give in and you'll both have fun." What had Dumbledore been referring too? Harry had had a hunch, Dumbledore wasn't talking about cooking. Harry really did want to cook with Ron. Harry had done it his whole life with the Dursleys (who were now doing wait watchers.), and Ron seemed to looked fascinate d when his mom cooked the wizard way, would he be fascinated with the muggle way. It wasn't like he wanted anything more of Ron, right. He asked himself

"Do I like Ron?"

"… I am out of my mind please leave a message."

Harry rolled his eyes. Maybe he should just attack Ron with 'cooking' and maybe they would both love to 'cook' to gather. I mean it wasn't like harry was attracted to those big blue eyes, that laugh, that smirk, that long red hair, that nice ass. Harry vigorously shook his head. He was trying his bet to get a naked Ron image out of his mind.

Ron wondered what had made Harry shake his head. Ron was thinking so hard, that his brain was working over time. Ron's eyes slowly made their way to Harry's butt. . Harry had a certain sway in his hips that was almost teasing Ron in a way that made him go hard in places he didn't even know he had. Ron grinned ear to ear. Suddenly his frown was turned upside down…….He was not gay!

"Oh come off of it you are"

"Prove it"

"Okay, have you ever kissed a girl"

"Ye-"

"Besides you mom?"

"No, but I have girlfriend."

"Yeah that you've never, kissed, boinked, or had erotic dreams of."

"So?"

"Your gay"

"I am not!"

"Yeah and Snape stole the cookie from the cookie jar"

"OMG….he did I was wonde-…Hey that was sarcasm again wasn't it."

"sigh"

Ron ended the conversation. He now noticed his feet had stooped just a few feet from Harry. Ron looked up and noticed that they were outside of the Fat lady portrait. Ron relaxed this was a problem. How was Ron's empty bed going to look to Harry? He had to get to the boy's dormitory before Harry did. Just as soon as Harry said the password.

Oh shit…..Harry didn't know the password.

Ron was so panicking. He had to say the password whether it blew his cover or not, he just hope Harry was in his dumbass mood for the night.

The fat lady stared down at Harry. "Password "she hissed

"Errr…" Harry stammered

Ron thought quickly, he would yell the password and ran as fast as he could.

"MAN WHO STAND ON TOILET HIGH ON POT "

As Ron said this he ran as fast as he could

The fat lady rounded on Harry

"You didn't have to yell, just because I am fat doesn't mean I'm deaf."

"But it wasn't me!" Harry said earnestly

"I'm sorry what did you say?"

The fat lady swung open revealing the passageway to the Gryffindor common room. Ron ran past Harry and in to the hole, he jumped over the couch (A/N: don't asked me how he jumped that big ass motherfucker cuz I have no idea he just did!) he ran quickly up the stairs straight into the boy's dormitory. He threw the cloak off and jumped in to his bed. He put his face flat in the pillow and lay on his stomach .(A/N: I don't know why he did that either but he is freaking Ron Weasley and can do whatever the hell he wants in my story!)

Harry stood there so transfixed he couldn't see straight. Someone had just screamed out the password and ran past him but he couldn't see them. 'what the hell' Harry thought. This is getting weird.

Still in thought he made his way through the portrait hole and in the Gryffindor common room. He looked around the common room. There were books, quills, papers, oddly enough condos. This intrigued Harry for a moment. He noticed they were still halfway in to the bag they were coming out of, curious to whom they belonged to, he open the bag and saw a wallet in it and read the 'this wallet belongs to' card. It read 'Ginny Weasley' quickly and disgustingly, throwing the wallet all the way across the room and made his way, a little faster this time, up the stone steps leading to the boy's dormitory. He opened the door and walked in.

He could hear the snoring loud and clear. He also hard Neville utter a few words as he passed but he was too tired to pay a attention. He walked between the beds and stopped at Ron's. There he was just laying there in to his pillow. Harry smiled. Ron looked so beautiful just laying there.

"Eww you just called Ron beautiful."

'No. I thought Ron was beautiful, I never said it out loud.

"…."

'Oh snap!''

Harry was scared now. He was have weird feelings in places he didn't know even have feelings and to make things more complicated the feelings were towards his best mate which was a dude……which was gay…..which he was…..not….maybe….possibly…..Okay fine it was that one time and he was plastered so it doesn't even count…right?

'It's just a phase ' Harry thought to himself.

Ron heard Harry walk in. His heart sank for the reason that Harry didn't catch him. Not for the reason other people's hearts sinks for somebody which is because they want to be shagged to death by the person their heart sank for ,that of course was not Ron's reason.

Ron had never been this confused sense the time he saw his mom and Mundugus Fletcher wrestling on his own bed, and let me tell you that was pretty confusing

Harry sighed and made his way over to his own bed. He put his pajamas and made his way under the covers until he noticed something odd laying there…

"Oh what pretty daisies"

Ron shuddered.

END OF CHAPPIE 3

SOOOOOOOOOO how was it? I thought it was pretty good. I am moving a lot faster then I thought that I would be. I have already got chapter 4 in my mind and I will put it to keyboard when at least one or two other people (besides you Hannah,, but you should still review to HINT HINT WINK WINK,) review.……Also In chapter 4 at my end of chapter chat (this is my end of chapter chat) I will hold a plot contest. I want to be working on a new fanfic while I do this one so be ready to vote next chapter. Also if you have any comments or questions or concerns I don't give a damn…naw I'm joking just send me and email or whatever. REVIEW REIVIEW REVIEW and I will give you…………………virtual ice-cream…….. and for those of you watching those pounds virtual nothing!!!!!)


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